These days in Florence I tune in to the international signal of TVE and I am surprised by the insistence on talking about an image crisis of our country abroad due to the declarations of the Minister of Consumption about the macro-farms and the quality, sustainable or not, of our meat. When browsing through other international channels, none talk about the bad image of our meat.
But something smells wrong. The news, from Al Jazeera to Fox, is: the Australian dilemma with Novak Djokovic; Boris Johnson’s ridiculous but measured apology for his parties during lockdown; or the impudent sex parties of Prince Andrew. The closest thing, in the flesh, that I find is the assertion of the magazine Tatler that our King Felipe is the most attractive of monarchs. in the italian magazine People They describe it as “fascinating, albeit a littlesuffocated” by her mother before her marriage.
Meat or fish? For me it was a discovery that it was a code to guess the sexual desires of each one. I am more carnivorous and although I am sorry that they generate harmful gases for sustainability, I admit that I lose a good steak. And a good thigh, like those of the anti-vaccine Serbian tennis player. If we could see inside the refrigerators of many politicians we would be surprised, because we are all more and more sustainable and we are used to tasting hamburgers made with mushrooms or soy. And oat milk, which by the way, some say is “faggot”, that’s why Vox don’t try it.
In fact, Djokovic, that man who is talked about all over the world and who is creating a true image crisis for tennis, for Serbia, for Australia and for vaccines; he maintains that spectacular physique because he avoids meat and gets protein from other sources. It is likely that his diet is also marked by his heart problems, with which he avoids the vaccine and that all this, crushed, has made him selfish and extreme.
The situation has become protein for the news. Now we are in that maybe he will be deported. It is clear that there is a lot at stake and that he is a privileged person who is allowed everything because he is like an anabolic agent that enhances the tournament where he plays. If in the end he manages to play, without being vaccinated, tennis will start to smell like bad meat.
Like San Lorenzo, patron saint of Florence, Boris Johnson is on the grill. What martyrdom this prime minister has with his domestic life and the barbecues that he has not wanted to miss despite the confinement he has imposed on his citizens! Boris is more fleshed out than Djokovic, but both show that power clouds your vision and annoys the palate. When you like strong flavors, you just want more. Johnson may not know how to say no to his current wife, Carrie Johnson, who the BBC has called “party addict”. Like the Spanish Consumer Minister, Johnson is also being asked to resign. It will be like another tennis match to see who wins.
When we talk about meat, we have to talk about collagen, youth and pedigree. Rocco Ritchie, the son of Madonna and Guy Ritchie, has all this, in abundance, who this week has been cooked as the only nutritious news. Rocco sells paintings for 30,000 euros under a pseudonym, but his true signature is his appearance. A look halfway between the film series about Sherlock Holmes, directed by his father and scenes from the documentary In bed with Madonna. Rocco has managed to mix, with style and mischief, meat with fish and create himself a dandy who confirms that food is as important as genes. Let us remember that when Rocco was a child, his mother hit a post-it on the fridge that read: “Apple yes, banana no”.
Eddie is an Australian news reporter with over 9 years in the industry and has published on Forbes and tech crunch.