Friday, March 29

Colbert on Trump’s ‘Pattern of Possible Fraud’: ‘Certainly More Credible Than a Pattern of Business’ | Summary of late night television


Stephen Colbert

The late-night hosts reveled in the details of the Trump family’s financial misconduct on Wednesday night, a day after New York Attorney General Letitia James’s office told a court that its investigators uncovered a pattern of “fraudulent or deceptive” business practices. in the family business. “That’s believable,” Stephen Colbert said on The Late Show. “It’s certainly more credible than a business pattern in the former president’s fraud.”

James presented the movement in response to Donald Trump’s attempts to stop her from questioning him and two of his children, Don Jr and Ivanka, under oath.

“Lord, please make that happen,” Colbert said. “I don’t ask for much, and I don’t ask often. All I want before I die is to see Don Jr swear by a bottle of hair gel from him. It’s the only thing he believes in.”

According to the filing, James’ team found significant evidence that Trump fraudulently valued multiple assets, including his private residence in Manhattan; Trump claimed the triplex apartment was 30,000 square feet in size, when in fact the actual size was just under 11,000 square feet. “Yeah, that’s not a surprise, he’s been known to falsely triple the size of his assets,” Colbert said. “He once told Stormy Daniels that her penis was three inches long.”

Trevor Noah

On The Daily Show, Trevor Noah also reacted to the accusation that Trump exaggerated the valuation of his New York apartment by more than 200 million dollars. “No Donald, no! You can’t overstate the value of your apartment by $200 million!” Noah said, feigning concern. “I mean, I’d get it if it was an NFT, but this is an apartment, my friend!

Also Read  Protest of the Venezuelan Assembly after the leak of the existence of Russian bases

“Donald Trump doesn’t give a shit, let’s be honest,” he continued. “This guy will brag about himself even if it gets him into trouble. I bet if a cop asked him how fast he was going, he would say, ‘yeah, I’m doing 400 billion miles a second, the fastest anyone’s ever gone, I was that fast.’ So fast, do you want to try it again?’”

But while there’s a lot to make fun of for the former president, “I can’t be mad at him for this,” Noah admitted. “Because at the core, he’s just a landlord, and this is what all landlords do in New York. They’ll say an apartment has three bedrooms, then you get there and two of the bedrooms are somehow in the kitchen, but it’s still the best deal for your budget, so you sleep in your dishwasher. It is what it is.”

Jimmy Kimmel

“The walls seem to be closing in on Trump,” said Jimmy Kimmel. “Big and beautiful walls. Mexico is like, ‘Let us know if you need us to contribute to that, guys.’

“Who could have predicted it? I mean, of all things, fraud? he joked, going over old news about the family’s many fraudulent schemes over the decades, from Trump University to his father’s real estate deal.

“It’s a pretty simple case,” he concluded. “To find fraud in a business, you just have to look for the signs, particularly the signs on top of the building that say Trump. And you will find it there. That’s where you’ll find his male pattern fraud.”

Also Read  Illness Reports Increase Among US Employees

In other bad news for the former president, the House select committee on the Jan. 6 attack on Capitol Hill this week subpoenaed four of his former aides, including his personal attorney Rudy Giuliani. “Which is unnecessary, all you have to do is say his name three times in the mirror and he will appear,” Kimmel joked. “And even if he shows up to answer the committee’s questions, he’ll just lie. That’s just what he does. He is a liar. He lies about things that he doesn’t even need to lie about.”

seth meyers

And on Late Night, Seth Meyers burst into Giuliani’s citation for his role in spreading election lies and fomenting the January 6 insurrection: “I’ll never get over the fact that that guy, who sounds like the guy who sprays the shoes in the bowling alley… that guy was once crowned ‘Mayor of the United States’ on magazine covers and became the personal attorney for the President of the United States,” Meyers mused.

“Rudy is what happens when a scientist accidentally splices the DNA of a fruit bat and Mr Bean, yet somehow ends up working for the most powerful person in the world.

“You picture in your head that the president has all this power and information at his fingertips,” he continued. “They have 17 different intelligence agencies, the White House situation room, an army of government lawyers, and some of the richest and most powerful people in the world on their side, and yet Trump ended up with a Moleman who sweats like If he was the accused. .

Also Read  New York City Transformed Police Accountability, Allowing Civil Lawsuits

“Trump told the guy to do a press conference at the Four Seasons Hotel, and he ended up at the Four Seasons Landscaping Company,” he added. “As a career comedy writer, I have to take my hat off.”


www.theguardian.com

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *