Monday, February 6

Matt Gaetz, Under Investigation for Sex With a Minor, Says Women Who Support Abortion Rights Are Too Fat and Ugly to Get Pregnant


Congress is filled with a lot of loathsome, moronic, thoroughly repugnant people, but perhaps none more so than Representative Matt Gaetz. Currently under investigation for allegedly paying women for sex and, separately, sleeping with a minor and transporting her across state lines, the Florida legislator responded to the assault on reproductive rights in May by tweeting: “How many of the women rallying against overturning Roe are over-educated, under-loved millennials who sadly return from protests to a lonely microwave dinner with their cats, and no bumble matches?” But apparently that was just the start of this overgrown frat boy’s ignorant antiabortion routine, which he followed up on Saturday by telling a room full of teens and young adults that any woman who supports reproductive rights is too ugly for him to f–k.

Yes, this person, who is somehow allowed to have a say in making laws, appeared before a group of students at the Turning Point USA Student Action Summit in Tampa and told them that people who are upset about the devastation of abortion rights across the country needn’t worry about a lack of access to medical care because no one in his cohort would want to get them pregnant anyway.

“Have you watched these pro-abortion, pro-murder rallies?” Gaetz asked. “The people are just disgusting. But why is it is that the women with the least likelihood of getting pregnant are the ones most worried about having abortions? Nobody wants to impregnate you if you look like a thumb. These people are odious on the inside and out. They’re like 5’2”, 350 pounds, and they’re like, ‘Give me my abortion or I’ll get up and march and protest.’ I’m thinking, March? You look like you got ankles weaker than the legal reasoning behind Roe v. Wade. A few of ‘em need to get up and march. They need to get up and march for like an hour a day, swing those arms, get the blood pumping, maybe mix in a salad.” 

Setting aside the fact that the crux of Gaetz’s bit is basically reverse-plagiarism of actually-funny-person George Carlin’s famous line, “Why is it that most of the people who are against abortion are people you wouldn’t want to fuck in the first place?” it’s quite stunning for a representative of the U.S. government to respond to the stripping of millions of people’s rights with insults about people’s looks. It’s extra stunning given that the elected official (1) seemingly had so few prospects that he allegedly had to sleep with women who were either underage or being paid, and (2) that he is so stupid that he reportedly left a digital trail of such activity.

Responding to Gaetz’s remarks on Monday, Marjorie Dannenfelser—the head of Susan B. Anthony Pro-Life America, an antiabortion group!—tweeted, “SHAME on @mattgaetz for this hideous comment.” Asked for comment, the congressman’s spokesperson simply told Insider that Gaetz is “proud to have an A+ rating from the Susan B. Anthony List.”



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